How do you eat a Universe?

How do you eat a Universe that contains 50k words + 2 podcasts + a new job + a website + a workshop + a writing mastery mentoring package? One bite of 1667 words at a time.

I have just released my Creative Space Mastery Podcasts in English and Brazilian Portuguese, with my new website: creativespacemastery.com

Somehow, I have also completed the Nanowrimo.org writing marathon, writing fifty thousand words in November.

Finally, I started at a new job. How? I asked myself. It’s a focus strategy, where I prioritised the tasks to secure the new job, got the words for the day (1667 words per day), got through a couple of tasks for the podcasts each day. Following inspiration, always. A phrase from one of the books from my collection of mini books is at the bottom of the principle I follow:

“Sit down to write what you have thought, and not to think what you shall write.”

William Cobbett

I use it and expand it… where I follow inspiration for guidance rather than trying to force its hand.

This year was manic-depressive, the old word for bipolar. It was fret with highs and lows, with moments of ecstatic joy, such as my sister and brother-in-law’s wedding, travelling with my parents, and having time for my creativity with a maturity to use it, as I didn’t have in 2010 when I took a sabbatical year for writing (back then, my time was filled with anxiety, while this year was full of joy). On the other hand, I call this year bipolar because if I had some great moments I also had the death of important people around me, uncertainty, dejection and other challenges.

This year, on one of the many occasions when I didn’t get a job, I also decided to stop the suffering and instead of working harder, I decided to work lighter. I concluded that if I spent my savings and finished with no job and just stress to amount for the time I had spent, it wasn’t worth it. But if I had advanced my creative projects, I would have spent it well.

From then on, I would spend half a day job searching and the rest of the day, creating. For guidance, the very next day, I walked the twelve kilometres of the Narrabeen Lagoon by myself, meditating on what was the starting point for my creative projects, where my inspiration wished me to go. What did heart and logic say? 

They said that Point Zero was the Podcasts, they were my heart poured out. 

They were something that I had been working to create for a while, I had been to Toastmasters to learn more about public speaking, I had been writing the content, and they would kick start the other projects. As I walked, and danced by myself, around the lagoon, among cockatoos and ducks, trees, flowers, flies and bees, the plan was set. When I sat down that week, a one-day-workshop for Creative space mastery came out. Fully structured and organised. 

I follow inspiration, faithfully, so I gave it all my dedication and love and the ideas I had been compiling and throwing in a folder gained form, gained order, shape, movement and logic. It is beautiful to see a narrative “become”. And just like that I had the content perfectly set and organised for my podcasts. And as a bonus, a day-workshop was created.

When November came about, a flood of inspiration came through. I had the scripts for the first episodes of the podcasts ready, the content for the related website, and the book about creative writing that is in its second draft was the perfect material for the writing marathon.

It was easy from there. Full creative flow. Never have I experienced so much of it. When you go through a lot of rejection of your abilities and gifts it is easy to forget to see these gifts, these abilities. That’s why having psychological help is invaluable. 

I have 3 angels, I show up for support sessions I set and the help I need, and the people who help me showed me the gift of having a hiatus from work at the prime of one’s life. With gratitude in my heart, creative Muse was generous and this month, it is all being born at creativespacemastery.com.

Como você devora um Universo?

Como você devora um Universo que contém 50 mil palavras + 2 podcasts + um novo emprego + um site + um workshop + um programa de mentoria em conquista do espaço criativo? Com uma bocada de 1667 palavras de cada vez.


Acabei de lançar meus podcasts Creative Space Mastery em inglês e português, com meu novo site: creativespacemastery.com

De alguma forma, também concluí a maratona de escrita do Nanowrimo.org, escrevendo cinquenta mil palavras em novembro.

Finalmente, comecei em um novo emprego. Como? Me perguntei. É uma estratégia de foco, onde priorizei as tarefas para garantir o novo emprego, me dediquei à escrita das palavras para o dia (1667 palavras), e a completar alguns objetivos para os podcasts todos os dias. Seguindo a inspiração, sempre. Uma frase de um dos livros da minha coleção de mini livros está no âmago dos princípios que sigo:

“Senta para escrever o que você pensou, e não para pensar no que você vai escrever.”

William Cobbett

Eu o uso e o expando… onde sigo a inspiração para orientação, em vez de tentar forçar sua mão.

Este ano foi maníaco-depressivo, a antiga palavra para bipolar. Foi repleto de altos e baixos, com momentos de alegria extasiante, como o casamento de minha irmã e cunhado, viajar com meus pais e ter tempo para minha criatividade com uma maturidade para usá-la, como não tive em 2010 quando tirei um ano sabático para escrever (naquela época, meu tempo foi cheio de ansiedade, enquanto este ano foi cheio de alegria). Por outro lado, chamo este ano de bipolar porque, se tive alguns momentos maravilhosos, também enfrentei a morte de pessoas importantes ao meu redor, incertezas, desalento e outros desafios.

Neste ano, em uma das muitas ocasiões em que não consegui um emprego, também decidi parar de sofrer e, em vez de trabalhar mais, decidi trabalhar de forma mais leve. Concluí que se gastasse minhas economias e terminasse sem emprego e apenas com estresse para justificar o tempo que gastei, não teria valido a pena. Mas se eu tivesse avançado nos meus projetos criativos, teria sido tempo bem gasto.

A partir de então, passei a gastar metade do dia procurando emprego e o restante do dia, criando. Para me iluminar, no dia seguinte, caminhei os doze quilômetros da Lagoa Narrabeen sozinha, meditando sobre qual era o ponto de partida para meus projetos criativos, para onde minha inspiração desejava que eu fosse. O que diziam o coração e a lógica?

Eles disseram que o Ponto Zero era os Podcasts, eles eram meu coração se derramando. 

Eram algo que eu vinha trabalhando para criar há algum tempo, tinha ido ao Toastmasters para aprender mais sobre falar em público, estava escrevendo o conteúdo, e eles dariam início aos outros projetos. Enquanto eu caminhava, e dançava sozinha, ao redor da lagoa, entre cracatoas e patos, árvores, flores, moscas e abelhas, o plano se definiu. Quando me sentei para escrever naquela semana, um workshop de um dia para a Conquista do Espaço Criativo saiu. Totalmente estruturado e organizado.

Sigo a inspiração, fielmente, então dei a ela toda a minha dedicação e amor, e as ideias que eu vinha compilando e jogando em uma pasta ganharam forma, ordem, movimento e lógica. É lindo ver uma narrativa “virar“. E assim, o conteúdo ficou perfeitamente definido e organizado para meus podcasts. E como bônus, um workshop de um dia foi criado.

Quando chegou novembro, uma enxurrada de inspiração veio. Eu tinha os roteiros dos primeiros episódios dos podcasts prontos, o conteúdo para o site relacionado, e o livro sobre escrita criativa que está em seu segundo rascunho era o material perfeito para a maratona de escrita.

Foi fácil a partir daí. Fluxo criativo total. Nunca experimentei tanto disso. Quando você enfrenta muita rejeição de suas habilidades e dons, é fácil esquecer de ver esses dons, essas habilidades. É por isso que ter ajuda psicológica é inestimável.

Tenho 3 anjos, compareço às sessões e à ajuda de que preciso, e eles me mostraram o presente de ter um hiato do trabalho no auge da vida. Com gratidão no meu coração, a Musa Criativa foi generosa e neste mês, tudo está nascendo em creativespacemastery.com.

Creative Space Mastery Podcast in the making

I’m self-published and by no means known for my writing. I’m unemployed at the moment, waiting for the right employer to find the best project support officer they could find.

Meanwhile, I’m done suffering with the rejection emails both for the creative applications and the job applications. Instead, I’m praying the storyteller’s serenity prayer and following my inspiration. I’m splitting my time and doing what I do best: creating compelling narratives, funny moments, generating positive thoughts even through my cover letters and resumés.

I’m splitting my time between my job applications now, and my creative projects. And next will come a Podcast because there is one thing I have mastered:

A regular, productive, creative practice!

It doesn’t matter what I’m going through, how happy or sad, how anxious or depressed or how hyper and excited, which is equally distracting, I can produce good quality productive outcomes. I can also be creative both when I’m very busy at work, which I did when I was working full time and studying for my Masters of Creative Writing, and now that I have too much time on my hands (which sometimes can get people overwhelmed and they don’t know where to start)>

I developed a method, a framework, a process that people can follow to craft a recurring creative process and named it Creative Space Mastery.

Now, I’m in the process of developing my podcast about it! Watch this space!

Fresh “The Dancing Bug”! From Orble to WordPress

Back in 2008 I created a blog at the the Australian Orble Community called THE DANCING BUG.

It was dedicated to writing about dancing and the Dancing scene in Sydney.

The Orble community disappeared suddenly a few years after I started writing, taking all the posts without notice.

One day it simply went offline.

I decided to move everything across to WordPress.

I was able to transfer the text, finding the images (or as close as I could) inside my old files, noting how many votes I had in Orble, the date and time they were published. I wanted to keep as close as I could from the original for historical data.

I’m keeping the new archive inside the category “The Dancing Bug” in my Taniacreations.com website.

This is the new blog, ready to receive my new writing thoughts on dancing as well…

Twice the blog was among the most voted in the whole community, once in 9th place for the day, once in 3rd place for the day:

04 Apr 2013 – 3rd Place – Directly from the Bachata Me Dance Floor

06 Apr 2013 – 9th Place – Directly from the Bachata Me Dance Floor

Here is a print-screen of the final statistics of the blog before it went awol:

46 Posts + 16 Comments +. 3,193 Votes

Equal Opportunity Creation

I believe we are all geared for creativity, and we are able until we die.

Only death is a true impediment to creativity, right?!

(my own thoughts)

No person should be disbelieved in their ability to create incredible art, products, solutions, ideas, kindness, magic, words, sounds, tears, joy… more than anything, no person should disbelieve their own ability to create something absolutely special.

Sometimes we have to let go of creating something specific, in order to find our talents in a very unexpected area, somewhere we thrive and achieve unbelievable highs.

No matter how many years of classical ballet I strived through, I was never able to grab my right leg with my left hand, in a split, and brush my left ear with it. My genetic make-up never permitted my elasticity to get there. At most, in the height of my fitness level at fifteen years old, I managed the spit, sweating profusely. And cursing.

I’m still a dancer in my heart, and I still dance in the living room and as a hobby, Latin styles, but my passion, my magic, morphed to another area where I’m better able to create art: storytelling.

I’m glad I kept believing though, deep down inside…

The Reason Today

The reason I write today is because I need to write the narratives I want to read.
I need to make my own story and read my own power in my storyline and not let others determine what is available for me to read.
I need to create in the world the possibilities I see in my mind’s eye.
I’m tired of the same old story where everyone conforms to what is dictated by the same old tales and tired run-through formulas.
I want fresh, unused, strange, and unique; my voice deserves to be out there.
Today I am all powerful.

Open Mindedness Galore

I am equally comfortable talking to a hard core scientist as I am with a reincarnated psychic astrologer, and I believe, most ardently, in both their rights of believing whatever they want.
I noticed this week that I was listening to a course about skepticism and how to improve thinking processes with the same eagerness I listen to the possibility of the existence of aliens in the Universe.
I enjoy being open to the possibility of mysteries, aliens, ghosts, multiple dimensions, universes and timelines, imagining there could be another me who is already a full time writer, and so many other possibilities. Would there be another world where the first contact has already been established? Ah, the wonderful world of imagination!


On the other hand, I’m not easily duped, not prone to believing in conspiracies, fake news or falling in cults, even though I believe in positive energies, alignments of planets, power of goddesses, and much of that crap (smile).
I think I accept more than I exclude, but it doesn’t mean I can be manipulated or believe blindly. Just means I’m open to ideas, even if I don’t know if they are real. I can see they could be real, or I can make them real in a book.

Delayed Achievements

I have achieved something that has been in my radar for many years. On 1st September 2018, I reduced my day-job journey to four days a week, to give myself one day a week of full time writing.

Right at the beginning I was organising my “Ideas for Writing” folder and found a list of writing goals I had set for 2017 and realised I had accomplished all of them by September 2018, one of them being the weekly author’s day. It was inspiring, even if there was a delay in the completion of the goals and it was a lesson that told me to keep establishing goals and not giving up on them even when they don’t follow my original timeline.

I can’t express how grateful and fulfilled I am feeling. Having one full day of quality time, fresh-brain, undivided attention to dedicate to my passion is unbelievably powerful. I am finding that not only I produce much more efficiently, the inspiration comes more powerfully, and the anxiety I used to feel over not having time to write has lost its grip on me.

I used to feel anxious every time I had an idea, and no energy or time to write it.

Another interesting aspect is that with the writing day in the middle of the week, (I chose Wednesdays for my Writing day) I get more done on weekends too. There is a momentum effect, by the weekend I haven’t forgotten what I have been working on, it just simmers under the surface, boiling new ideas and aspects to focus on…

I will never take this opportunity for granted, I feel grateful to each of the moments and aspects of my life that allowed me to get here.

Lucifer & the amazon

If Lucifer comes up to me and says “what do you desire?”

“Me? Right now?”

“Yes…’ he is a bit irritated with my lack of immediate response and insists ‘what do you most desire?’

His eyes burrow deep in mine, with that intense vampiric hypnotic look.

‘Well… in fact,’

‘Tell me, tell me your needs…’ he looks sexy.

I’m decisive now. I know what I want. ‘Many, many, many, reviews.’

‘Reviews?’ he is thrown off his game, forgets about the intense look. ‘For your soul, what do you want for your soul?’

‘I told you. Reviews. Amazon Reviews. Great, independent, unhinged, unbiased, uninhibited, five star, reviews.’

‘Fuck.’

‘That I can get, but reviews… seriously, no money can buy. And since I’m giving my soul for it, I want many, in all my books.’

When did I Start Writing?

At a certain point in my life I came to the conclusion that I wanted to be a writer. I find  it hard to remember how or when exactly I got to that point. Probably, a turning point happened when I was about 25 years old and I wrote a short-story that was selected as a finalist for an anthology book. By then I had decided that being a ballet dancer wasn’t for me after all. At 17 I had dropped out of my dance uni degree and moved to advertisement and marketing. At 25 I had been working at a large multinational corporation that was draining my blood.

One day I was driving alone to work, from the car radio I heard a voice saying:

“Writing is your major gift”. I’m aware the phrase is a bit strange but I cannot change the voice from beyond just to fit the English grammar, so I will leave it as is, the closest translation.

That moment I made a decision (based on a voice I imagined because I was delirious of boredom, most probably, but who cares, right?). I had been trying to write more and more and I realised I had to find a way to have a good quality of life to have energy left for writing. If you check the post “why Australia?” you will see how that brought me to Sydney’s beautiful shores.

Although, the decision was made when I was an adult, the more I search for when I started actually writing, the further back I go.

My best friend pointed out to me that none of her childhood friends wrote a story about the time they caught the maid making out with the security guard. I was telling my friend how terrified I was of this maid because she found my story and was very upset at me. Lost in my anguish cause by the upset maid I didn’t realise that most kids don’t write about stuff like I did all the time.

When I first learnt what poetry was, I also sold some poetry to my grandfather which I never delivered because I was then as I am now: hopeless at poetry. I did try though, ended up writing a few lines without an end. I ate my payment in candy and that was that.

I remember the look in the face of my fourth grade teacher when instead of delivering a writing assignment with one page, as I was supposed to do, I delivered twelve pages. Just because I couldn’t cut the story short, stop it in the middle, I had to take the character walking all the way from school to work… Poor teacher, she was a mean one but I’m not sure she deserved that punishment.

A few years later my beautifully-bummed high-school teacher published a book with short-stories, I had a story there. (Beautifully-bummed because as a Brazilian teenager, like all other Brazilian teenagers, I was obsessed with the roundness of people’s behinds around me and such youngish teacher had very nice buttocks that would shake firmly when he wrote on the blackboard.) [Two more notes: I’m still obsessed with round buttocks and at the time it was an actual back board, where you make all that effort to write with chalk.]

While I was on my dancing career path I only thought I would write a book when I retired, I wasn’t really thinking, probably from lack of food, the brain didn’t work very well. I’m grateful to say that I added things up before starving to death and changed my mind. This is my reasoning:

I am not flexible enough to be a prima ballerina + I live in a third world country quite worried about food and health, not art + I can never eat + I am always fat = bad idea.

Once I stopped dancing professionally — I still dance for pleasure — I started writing more, I’ve always had ideas, many, many ideas for being so, even if I had to give up writing about the maid’s kisses.